Glorious day?

One thing I have wondered about is we sing “one day he is coming, oh glorious day” isn’t that kind of selfish? We walk around seeing people walking down the street next to us; we have neighbors that don’t know Christ, it isn’t going to be a glorious day for them. For us, yes, what an amazing, wonderful day to finally see God’s face, to be in his presence and to kneel before him. But for our neighbors or coworkers what a horrible dreaded day that will be and shouldn’t we take some responsibility for that? When we sing songs about that glorious day do we even think about what it will be like for the non-believers?---Larissa

Sunday

Today I went to church and yet again I cried. I used to be the type of person that never really cried. Well that’s not really true I am as tough as nails when it comes to pain. No one really knows how much pain I’m really in or how sick I actually am, but when it came to others suffering I cry or even for just a good sappy movie. I also always skip the anger stage and go right to crying. But going through years of sickness, not knowing if you are going to get better and longing for the amazing life you had is hard. Well in church today first of all I was having a bad sick day but I went anyways. At church 3 things were just casually brought up and that’s all it took and I started to tear up. The first was during worship. It was a song about the joy in going to heaven. For someone like me that brings up weird emotions: joy and fear. The second was missions I miss it with all my heart. The third was children. I have this fear that I’m going to be sick for the rest of my life and I won’t have the strength to have kids. But even with all the fears God is there and his plan is what is best. God gives me his peace when I really need it. A couple days later he gave me a song, “Praise you in this storm” by Casting Crowns. It talks about God holding my tears and a lot of other things that really helped.---Larissa 

Larissa's thoughts

First of all I would like to thank everyone who is praying for me. You have no idea how much it means to me, the amount of support I have from everyone. I wanted to tell how this sickness has affected me. One of the hardest things for me is that the sickest takes away my personality. I can’t be me. I don’t have the energy to be the energetic active person that I am. Before I was the one planning get togethers and creative things to do. I would run around and talk to everyone. Now its like I’m a fly on the wall I have to hang on my little sister’s arm so I don’t fall over and even just talking to people takes so much energy that it seems like I have one fourth of my old personality. It’s hard not having people see the real you. But I think the number one thing that is the hardest with the sickness is feeling like you’re not an effective servant. I went from being a missionary leading a school with around 500 students to pretty much laying in my bed all day. I got the privilege of witnessing to those students every day, it was amazing. I know I’m sick for a reason and God can use it. It’s just hard I want to go out and witness to people but I don’t have the strength. During worship time at church a lot of times I don’t even have the strength to raise my hands to praise him the way he deserves to be worshiped. I know God has a plan and that is the only thing that gets me through. I just want to be used.   ---Larissa